Tuesday, September 23, 2008

What’s the trick that can turn anyone into your friend?

Talking to people has never seems tough. Some people said that no matter you are talking to a 3 years old kid or an 80 years old senior citizen, it will make no different if you own the communication skill. So, what’s the secret of the communication skill?

A friendly smile
The best way to break the ice is always by putting a warm and friendly smile while we talk. Once we smile, people will feel easier to approach us and talk to us. Very often, an unapproachable and cool look were created when we don’t smile, hence, strangers may find it hard to communicate with us.

Seek for common interests
Always probe for clues to the person’s interests and take times to analyze the people we are talking to. Our conversation will become smoother when we hit the “hot button”. People always love to talk to those who share the same interests as they do.

Make them feel good about themselves without being sarcastic
Most people need other people to ensure them that they are good and give them confidence. Sometimes, what we need to do in order to make them feel good when they are around us is just by giving them encouragement when they need it.

Always be positive about life
Nobody will love to be around people who are pessimistic and always complaining about how bad their life had been going. Our emotions were easily affected by the people around us. Therefore, if we are always optimistic and feel contented with our life, people around us will feel more relax and enjoy talking to us.

Use an appropriate language when communicate with different groups of people
Bear in mind that every group of people had their unique ways of communication. E.g. when we are talking to kids, often we shows a commanding way which will brings up a tense environment and make them felt hard to communicate with us. Hence, if we want to mix well with them, we must learn to speak in their language when communicating with them.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Big corporate VS Small corporate

No doubt, as an employee, we will always prefer working in big corporation compare to small corporate as the brand name of the corporation itself shown our sense of achievement and capability. Our impressions for big corporation are always better remunerations, higher possibility of promotion, easier for job’s hoping in future and greater satisfactions.

We always overlooked the prospects in big corporation and neglected the future prospects in small corporate. Always we had forgotten that every big corporation was once small. Some of the higher management people in the big corporation were once a small soldier in the corporate multitasking and fighting hard for the corporate to grow. Thus as the corporate grew, they were being promoted.

From a better point of views, working in a small corporate although might have more work loads, somehow, it helps to train us to be more efficient and increase our productivities. If we are capable enough to handle all the tasks given, our boss will always felt heavy-hearted to let us go, hence, he/she will tend to offer us with a better remunerations just for the sake to keep us staying in the corporate. Sometimes, the remunerations offer might be better than what we can get in big corporation. “My boss bought me a Toyota Wish after I accidentally banged my company’s car which is a Perodua Myvi,” says Jane, a 28-year-old sales representative in a small corporate.

Few years back, when I was a new grad from school, paying high hopes to work in big corporation was my first priority. As I was lacked of experiences, I was only able to get into a small accounting firm which offers ‘peanut’ pay. I was a newbie then, everything seems to be fresh and I’ve to start learning from zero. It takes me few months to pick up everything and to handle full set accounts for seven companies individually. The work loads is much and the period given were always short.

Sooner, I was given a few opportunities to enhance my skills. No longer have I needed to stay in the office’s desk all the time. I was being sent out for extra training. In additions, I was being promoted as my boss’s assistant whom responsibility is to train-up new staff in newly start-up big corporation, checking errors of the job done by colleagues and to ensure all the accounts to be completed before the due date. Also, I was given an extra advantage to work only three days a week with a higher pay.

Being sent to newly start-up big corporation, I was able to see the capability of the staff. Although my experience wasn’t as much as the trainee’s staff in the corporate, my knowledge was more as my job scope were larger. The trainee’s staff were only be able to handle part of the company’s accounts, therefore, their knowledge were very limited. Their office politics were much more complicated as everyone was trying hard to prove their capability and striving hard for promotion.

After all, maybe we should start thinking of working for a small corporate the next time we plan to switch job.

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Nice men always finished last?

No doubts women nowadays are getting more financial independence as well as more careers minded. Many women may not settle down for anything less than the best. No longer had they felt the need to get married just because they had reached the marriage age.

Let’s Admit It: No matter how strong a woman shows, still she had her own weaknesses. At certain times, she still needs someone to support her. And yet she is still single. WHY?

Some of my friends are pretty, smart, capable and have the qualities which should have not kept them from being single. Somehow, they are still single and yet they always asked, “Where have all the dateable men gone?”

Story 1: DATING WITH THE NOT-SO-NICE LEFTOVERS
Kate, a 29-year-old manager, bumped into an Indian guy (let’s called him Mr. X) while she went to the gym for RPM classes. Mr. X got her contact number from the class’s registration sheet and started to texted her. Kate was curious to have received the text messages from a stranger; hence, she replied and asked for clarifications. Mr. X introduced himself as a 39-year-old ex-lawyer switching to be a businessman and insists on making an appointment to meet Kate in the gym. Out of her curiosity, Kate agreed to meet him. Kate wasn’t interested in Mr. X but wouldn’t mind of keeping him as a friend as he seems to be quite a gentleman after all. Therefore, Kate didn’t want to miss out the future possibility. Things gone worse when Mr. X sends tons of text messages to Kate everyday and Kate couldn’t even bother to reply. Mr. X turned out to be a stalker when he found out that Kate refused to accept his flowers and avoiding his text messages. Moreover, Mr. X started to lose his temper over Kate by sending her annoying text messages everyday, insisting that he was a good person who doesn’t even mind to be a homemaker and reminding Kate not to miss out the chances.

Lessons:
Guys being too aggressive and loses their patients in a short period of times is a totally turn off behaviors. Women can survived being single yet living happily and therefore, they would never allowed any men to threaten them for losing up a chance to settle down. Those men who claimed themselves as too-good-to-be-miss are always the not-so-nice leftovers; hence, it is always the right choice to eliminate them as soon as possible.

Story 2: DATING WITH EQUALLY-RIGHTS JERK
Vivian and Justin used to shared every of their expenses during their outings. Both of them were working in a listed corporate with a high-pay job. At the beginning stage, Vivian wouldn’t mind to pay her own shares of expenses. Soon as they proceed, Vivian moved-in into Justin’s house, Justin begins to divide every single cents of the household’s expenses equally and asking Vivian to pay. In additions, Vivian will have to do most of the household’s chores as Justin was always working overtime in the office. Also, she was only allowed to hang out with her girlfriends after she got the permissions from Justin. As times passed-by, Vivian realized that her expenses were getting higher, spending on some unnecessary stuff that Justin insisted on buying and she lost her freedom and happiness she used to have when she was single. She decided to break up with Justin and back to her single life. To her surprise, Justin requested to collect back all the gifts he had given to Vivian as it was paid by him.

Lessons:
It is a totally jerk’s behavior for taking back all the gifts given after a broke up. In a relationship, not everything can be divided equally, it is always give-and-take. Although women nowadays are more financially capable, they are not meant to be taken advantages of. It will always leave them with doubts to stay in the relationship for long term if everything were to be share equally. When a woman got pregnant, can the man split up the months of the child in the mother’s womb and share the pains?

Sometimes I wondered, if the phrases of “Nice men always finished last” is true, where do all this nice men gone? My girlfriends told me once, most nice men were either married or in a serious relationships, therefore, what’s left in the market are only the not-so-nice leftovers.

Monday, September 8, 2008

Love Quote

“Don’t worries, from now on, I’ll never let you walk alone anymore…” she smiled as she listened to his words clearly. She was truly touched by every word he said but she was too afraid to express herself and hence, she gone speechless.

She was a girl who hardly shows her expression. Deep inside her heart, she just wanted to say thank you. It was a blessing in the skies to have him around, always by her side.

“I was neither an angel nor a gift from the God but you saw the best in me and I’m grateful to have your love. Thanks God, I found you.” she whispered to God as she controlled the tears in her eyes.


There is no surprise more
magical than the surprise
of being loved: it is God's
finger on a human being's
shoulder.

Charles Morgan

Friday, September 5, 2008

Perfect Diet

There are lots of diet plans and weight-loss programs that we can see in the market such as Mediterranean Diet, Glycemix Index Diet, Atkins Diet, Slim Fast Diet, Vegetarians Diet and etc. Somehow, people had always neglected the facts that the perfect diet program is which we can continue to follow throughout our life.

Most of the diet programs help us to control the daily calories intake as well as fats intake. We will tend to lose few pounds at the beginning of the new diet program but the result will soon become stagnant when our bodies get immune to it. As we are satisfied with the results, we will always switch back to our normal eating habits and thus gained back the weights that we had lost.

To find the perfect diet program, we must understand ourselves clearly. It is always hard for a person to let go of their favourite foods for long term. Hence, the effective way to lose weights and keep the weights that we had lost is always by following a healthy diet and healthy lifestyle.

Quite often, we don’t practice what we preach. This happens as we can’t change our old lifestyle completely overnight. To start switching into a more healthy diet and healthy lifestyle, it doesn’t mean of letting go our favourite food completely. For example, we can start from cutting off ¼ of the normal serving portion of meats from our meals. Follow by adding more vegetables and fruits into our daily diet. By this way, we can slowly practice eating healthily without the needs to sacrifice our favourite foods. Also, we can always try to opt for a lower calories or lower trans-fats foods as a substitute to our routine diet. For an example, we can choose to have skim-milk instead of full cream milk when drinking freshly-brewed coffee, using sugar-free fruits jam instead of normal jam on our toast or eating noodles with clear soup instead of fried noodles.

Simply by choosing our foods wisely and practicing a healthier lifestyle, we can lose the extra inches effectively and keep it for long term.

P.S: Always bear in mind, by frequently switching to a new diet program when the old ones are no longer useful is similar to a yoyo-diet which is harmful to the bodies

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Faith

Yes, I have doubted. I have wandered
off the path. I have been lost.
But I always returned. It is beyond
the logic I seek. It is intuitive--an
intrinsic, built-in sense of direction.
I seem to find my way home.
My faith has wavered but has saved me.

Helen Hayes

Life is not a level, smooth path, but rather a series of hills and valleys. There are times spent on the mountain top, when everything seems clear and perfect. Then there are times when we’re wandering around in a dark cavern, feeling our way along and trusting God for every step of faith.

During a marathon run, often the feeling of giving up will appears in my mind as I felt tired and exhausted. If I could force myself to go on, I will get a “second wind” to move on to the finish line. As I choose to continue in faith, no matter how I feel or what’s going on around me, God will lift me up and carry me on.
I may feel lost at the moment but I’ll always return as I believe in faith and faith will lead me home.

Monday, September 1, 2008

Zen stories

Zen Story 1:

Two monks were once traveling together down a muddy road.
A heavy rain was falling. Coming around the bend,
they met a lovely girl in a silk kimono and sash,
unable to cross the intersection.

"Come on, girl," said the first monk. Lifting her
in his arms, he carried her over the mud.

The second monk did not speak again until that night
when they reached a lodging temple. Then he no longer
could restrain himself. "We monks don't go near females,"
he said. "It is dangerous. Why did you do that?"

"I left the girl there," the first monk said.
"Are you still carrying her?"

Zen Story 2:

Hogen, a Chinese Zen teacher, lived alone in a small temple
in the country. One day four traveling monks appeared and
asked if they might make a fire in his yard to warm themselves.

While they were building the fire, Hogen heard them arguing
about subjectivity and objectivity. He joined them and said:
"There is a big stone. Do you consider it to be inside or outside your mind?"

One of the monks replied: "From the Buddhist viewpoint everything
is an objectification of mind, so I would say that the stone is inside my mind."

"Your head must feel very heavy," observed Hogen,
"if you are carrying around a stone like that in your mind."


Do you understand the meanings that lie within the Zen stories?

Both of the stories came with a same meaning which is, letting go. If we can free our mind from things that bothering us, life could be happier. If we could let go the angers, let go the jealousy and let go the negatives thoughts, our life would be easier.


If your mind is empty, it is always ready for anything;
it is open to everything. In the beginner's mind there are
many possibilities, in the expert's mind there are few.

Shunryu Suzuki-Roshi